Here I was, getting a review ready for you, then a few nights ago while eating and watching weird late-night tv, The Evil Assistant and I found ourselves passing by TVSN, Australia’s home shopping network. Yes, the wonderful and sometimes ridiculous world of home shopping, where you can pay over $500 for this absolutely ugly bag, or a Magic Bullet, the device I care about more than most things, including children.
So what warranted us to stare at the tv in utter disbelief? What made our mostly rational brains short-circuit? For us to feel so offended for our bodies? For me to stop other posts to post a PMS-fuelled annihilation of a product?
Why, the Neckline Trainer/Slimmer!
Yes, on first sight, you would do what we did and scoff, roll your eyes and/or crack up laughing at the idiocy in a ~rose gold~ packaging. Ooooh, modern and fancy! Yet the Neckline Trainer (or if you’re in the States, “Neckline Slimmer“, or sometimes called the “Neck Genie“) has been around for years and has already done the As-Seen-On-TV laps plenty of times before.
For our virgin eyes, this was our first time, and we’ve never felt so much contempt for a product – or a TVSN presenter – before.
As a former beauty advisor and all-round person who just needs to know stuff, I have tried a lot of different face cleansers, both manufactured and home-made. Lately, though, I’ve been scaling back as we could be moving (for real this time) and I finished up the last of my cleanser, so on a whim at the supermarket I bought something for $2 that has made me postpone using cleansers this winter.
Are you ready for it?
It’s winter time so it’s been the perfect time to get someone else’s cooties and get sick! In a way I’m really lucky because I don’t have a job or a routine to get back to where I have to go back out into public, but there have been many times I’ve had to cover up a shredded nose and watery eyes.
If that relates to you I have some handy tips to squelch the last of that cold or flu and get you back to feeling and looking better.
So a few months ago when I went stupid at Sephora I actually got a free lipstick with the purchase of my awesome Zoeva foundation brush. That brush was actually the first time I’ve tried Zoeva and this lipstick is actually the first makeup I’ll be trying by the brand, so let’s see what it’s about!
My awesome friend sent me a belated birthday/Christmas x 3 (we’d been meaning to send each other presents for 3+ years), but last week I received an awesome box from her and I thought I’d show you some of the cool things I got, maybe some you might want me to review? I don’t know, but let’s have a peek.
Lipsticks are regularly between $20-$30. A palette with five eyeshadows can be close to $100 bucks and the cheapest and usually ‘cost-friendly’ packaging apparently is the most bougie thing because it has an ominous K attached in it.
What the fuck? Did I go to sleep one night and wake up in an alternate timeline? Did I hit my head? Again? Wasn’t the MAC lipsticks I was buying in Canada 15 bucks like.. two seconds ago? Now to get one I’m looking at $36?? Again, what the fuck?
With previously non-cosmetic brands dipping their toe into the makeup waters, beauty influencers (aka “YouTube Makeup People”) attached to companies being the norm, everyone is taking a ride at getting your money. I mean, that’s cool; competition is good for customers as we hold the key. However, the price I’m willing to spend and the products I’m offered are not on the same page most of the time. When I review a product on here, the price and value are pretty much the top of the pinnacle… which I guess is why I haven’t reviewed much makeup.. *cough*
Anyway, it’s getting a bit ridiculous out there and I want to know why, so, I went on a month-long journey down the Alice-In-Wonderland rabbit hole to gather as much information and to cover different areas and instances. It was… stressful. My eyes hurt. The speech program on my computer needed a glass of water every 1000 words spoken.
Do I have any real information to give you? I don’t know, but let’s find out.
[I might try to break this up into smaller parts because once you go down this rabbit hole of bullshit, it’s hard to get out. I literally have 12 tabs open, 2 down from a few days ago.
Also, don’t be surprised if I amend this post 20000 times because I’ve forgotten to put things in it.]